Sometimes it sucks to be anxious. Like when you go to bed at 6 p.m.

That’s what I did Monday night. Overwhelmed by some things at work, I was unable to even give my wife my preference for dinner. As she always does, she was being supportive and loving and wanting to try to provide some comfort and control to me, this time by picking our supper plans. But I wasn’t having it. I was just done.

So I said, “I just wanna go to sleep.” So I did.

This isn’t the first time I’ve done this. It’s happened a few times during COVID-19. I’ve just given myself permission to hit the hay early. I left the world behind and curled up in bed, shutting myself away.

It’s a fairly common anxiety response. In an effort to escape from the feelings and fears inherent in anxiety, you shut yourself off and go away. It’s easier than facing those things head on. Most of the time, you can’t be convinced that you’re just caught up in anxiety anyway.

Like most mental health issues, anxiety is a known liar. But it does a damn good job of telling you that it’s the truth.

I’ve spent a lot of my life being a fact-checker. Whether it was in my job as a journalist, my interest in analyzing religion or my steadfast fear of being wrong, I just can’t let falsehoods go. In today’s culture, that’s easier said than done.

I’ve gotten pretty good for the most part at doing that on social media. A couple examples stand out, but I won’t go into those here. One involved politics and one involved hockey. Both involved the current conversation on racism and racial equity. But that’s another blog post.

But when it comes to falsehoods in my own life, I’m always trying to root them out. If there’s something I think or believe that is incorrect, I wear myself out trying to fix it. That sounds admirable, right?

But in the effort to correct myself, I often find falsehoods where there are none. That adds to my anxiety.

Additionally, anxiety creates falsehoods that I find true.

So I get stuck. I get stuck in a morass of fear, tension, uncertainty, confusion and more. Those things make finding the truth, the real truth, so much harder to find.

I don’t have a magic-bullet solution here. I don’t know the answer, other than, at least on Monday night, just try to sleep it off. But I think there are a couple things I’d encourage people with anxiety — and those who love them, if they’re around — to try.

If you’re unsure, ask. My anxiety this week came from a meeting that I wasn’t sure how it went. So I found myself asking others to make sure that all was well. It’s much better to ask an awkward question than sit in anxiety and discomfort. If you’re on the receiving end of a question of this sort, be patient with that person. If it sounds like a silly question, it may be — but a question being “silly” doesn’t make it worthless. You might be saving someone’s sanity.

Go to bed at 6 p.m. if you need to. The day after I went to bed early, I texted one of my best friends and said I did something dumb, referring to my early bedtime. He said something wise: “That’s not dumb, sometimes you just have to take care of yourself and it requires special measures.” Don’t let anyone define what those “special measures” are for you. Friends and family, once again, exercise patience with the one with anxiety. They need it, and sometimes it involves them doing admittedly out-of-the-ordinary things. Give them space for it.

At some point, wallowing is unhelpful. There is a time to wallow and a time to swallow it up and push forward. Take the time you need then get off the canvas. Whatever it takes, as long as it’s healthy. I’m not saying go down a whole liquor shelf and start driving to work. I’m saying find a healthy way to get back in the game. Friends and family, gentle encouragement is critical, emphasis on the gentle. Odds are, they won’t believe you at the beginning. But you need to be there because they might not make it or choose a self-destructive alternative.

Choosing helpful responses to mental health issues is critical. This is by no means an exhaustive list. But think about what you can do for yourself to help you through.

And friends and family, I encourage you to consider what you can do. You may be a life-saver.